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Warehouse Roulette – Leaky Banana!
May 17, 2012 5:30 am | by
I’ve been bugged by Jenn and others to write posts on the blog for a long time, but I didn’t want to have to figure out what to write about while staying somewhat on topic. So the obvious solution was to write about random things in the warehouse. Warehouse Roulette! To make it fun and very random, I put all of the warehouse locations in a box, mix it up and draw a location. I could just pick things, but then it wouldn’t really be random. Someday I’ll write about the tree frogs that stick to the doors at night and the poor frog that got squashed between the garage door panels (why yes, I do have a picture of it). We did have a 4.5 foot black snake sunning itself on the steps outside our warehouse the other day. That was exciting. Many of the ladies who work in the warehouse are deathly afraid of snakes, which makes us guys (the few there are) giddy with excitement. Of course we caught the snake and put it in a box so Mr. Dan could take it home. Then someone, who shall remain anonymous, who works in marketing, pulled a brilliant prank and switched out the box containing the snake with another box without the snake. OOOO Wee! Talk about fireworks when that hit fan! The girls were freaking out, Mr. Dan was po’d the snake was gone, and I was bummed because we didn’t have any of this on video!
 
Once in a while I read a little grumbling about my lack of words used to talk about whatever product I draw. More insight! More inside scoops! More scoops of ice cream! I hear you, I feel your pain, I want more ice cream too. This week is a perfect example of why I love Warehouse Roulette. I just never know what I’ll draw, even if I have an idea of what’s on the shelves in the general area. What was sitting there staring at me like a cute puppy this week? Broken ceramic coffee mugs! Yes, apparently we have a box with broken mugs sitting on the floor. Who knew?! We made these mugs last year to tie into our ABC Kids show theme – “I’m a Genius”. It  is a reference to our new bumGenius Freetime diaper and our new Albert print. The Freetime really does reduce the complexity of a pocket diaper to a very simple put-it-on diaper. If you haven’t tried one, stop by your local retailer and check it out. I think you’ll like it. 
 
Back to the broken mugs. They are really nice mugs, especially the non-broken ones.  They are double walled and have a rubber version of a lid you’d find on a St. Louis Bread Company (Panera) Solo cup. Jenn uses her’s all the time. I don’t drink much coffee, so I don’t really use one, but I have one somewhere. The broken ones are cool too. Some are just cracked down the side. Some are chipped at the rim and this one was cracked all the way around so I could pull the pieces apart. I’ve never done that to an insulated ceramic mug before.
 
The crack pattern on the side reminds me of the Yodeling Climber game on The Price is Right. Can’t you see the little guy climbing up the side? Next up, a can of name brand pinto beans. Argh.. I didn’t study the beans. I always buy store brand. Shoot… ummm… how much are they? They can’t be more than a dollar, or are they? I only have $.75 before the climber falls off the side. Bob’s giving the stink eye to hurry up. oh oh oh… what to do, what to do…. $1.15! Yo-de-lay yo-de-lay yo-de-lay… urp. He stopped! Hallelujah! Next up… Fixodent denture glue. What the… damnit… 
 
The climber guy game is actually one of my favorite games. The other game I always liked was the putting game. It was one of the few times Bob would play the game and show off his skillz (since he “never misses a put”).  One of the most annoying is Plinko. It’s just too random (ironic, eh?). It’s like playing a pull tab lottery ticket. It’s fun to do, but you know you’re not really going to win anything. Sure you have to have a little clue in really big bucket to win the Plinko chips, but really, it’s not that hard… Next up is the Mixalot Toaster. It toasts bread and makes a lot of smoke when you do it wrong. Does the price start with a nine or end with a four? It’s always good TV to hem and haw and look to the audience to add some drama… but, unless the toaster mixes me a drink and washes the dog, I’m going with the four on this one Bob. After winning the chips, you might as well put them all in the same spot since they’ll bounce around and end up in different places. It is fun to watch the chip bounce down board tho. What kind of pegs do they have in the board to make that cool plink plink plink sound as it goes down? 
So after loosing the cliff hanger game because I don’t know what fake teeth glue costs, it’s time to spin the big wheel. I go back and forth on what strategy to use spinning the big wheel. It can’t be too heavy since Bob can spin it one handed and it must have really good bearings to go all the way around when the little old lady spins it. Is it better to try to spin it around only once and land on the dollar the first time, then try to rip it off the wall the seconds time just to get more air time? Or is better to try to rip it off the wall the first time then try to land on whatever number is needed to be closest to a dollar the second time? I could even under-spin it the first time just to get a feel for the wheel, then get two real spins. Can you tell I watched too much Price is Right growing up? I miss Bob. Drew does a good job, but Bob is The Price is Right.
 
The other thing I’ve always wondered about is the show case show-downs. Sometimes they are fairly even, sometimes one is jaw dropping while the other looks like Bob cleaned out his garage. Then other times they are just over the top ridiculous (I’m referring to the daytime version, not the super duper prime time episodes). What happens to all of the stuff that isn’t won? Is there a big warehouse they rotate product through? The sales team must have crazy days talking to all types of companies to secure product. Cheeze log food product, automatic dog walkers and a brand new car!
 
The mug has a hole in the bottom. It’s a round hole plugged with a plug. It’s probably used to hold the mug while it’s dipped in glaze, but it looks like some of the gaze leaks into the inside of the mug. I’ve never noticed that before. Leaking glaze into the hole has the nice side benefit of smoothing out the rough edges around the hole. It also makes the inside layer of the mug look very extra phallic. It looks like {edit edit edit}. Well, it’s not too hard to figure out what it looks like. I’d say ask Google, but you probably shouldn’t, especially with the filter off. I think the leaky banana part of the mug is going on my shelf next to my obscene Artist Series diaper. Such filth! 
 
— Jimmy
“Keep smiling, it makes everyone wonder what you’re up to.”
 
copyright 2012 Cotton Babies, Inc – Leaky Banana!

About the Author

Jimmy Labit is a full-time dad and has a lot of experience with cloth diapers. He takes care of the technical side of Cotton Babies when he isn't trying to juggle four kids. He is the male voice of Beyond The Diaper and brings a unique and quirky sense of humor to our blog.

Comments

7 Comments

  • Alma W said...
    May 17, 2012 at 8:37 pm

    I love this one

  • Bethany Haid said...
    May 17, 2012 at 10:57 am

    Okay, I admit I skimmed a bit on this one. BUT don’t stop writing, Jimmy! You are funny and its great to read your thoughts. For some clarity, maybe if you made shorter paragraphs, that would promote readability. BUT, I am just a former middle school teacher, so what do I know?

    I do wish you could share a photo of the obscene artist series diaper. I am going to scour ours today when I do the laundry!

    • Jimmy said...
      May 21, 2012 at 8:40 pm

      When I draw a BG 4, I’ll post a pic of infamous diaper. 🙂

      I’ll work on the paragraphs too. I get carried away going dow the rabbit hole.

  • Anonymous said...
    May 17, 2012 at 10:41 am

    Wonderful. You’re so funny, and what a pretty snake!

  • Anonymous said...
    May 17, 2012 at 8:26 am

    Wow! Such a beautifully random post to wake up and feast my eyes on. Glad I drank several cups of coffee!

  • Anonymous said...
    May 17, 2012 at 7:47 am

    I think the mug has a hole in the bottom so that it doesn’t explode during “firing”. Double-wall mug+trapped air=pottery explodes. Cool, huh?

    • Jimmy said...
      May 21, 2012 at 8:39 pm

      Ah, you’re probably right. I thought it was for preventing the dishwasher heat and moisture from causing the cup to explode.