Warehouse Roulette – The Sh*tcan
April 26, 2012 5:30 am
I’ve been bugged by Jenn and others to write posts on the blog for a long time, but I didn’t want to have to figure out what to write about while staying somewhat on topic. So the obvious solution was to write about random things in the warehouse. Warehouse roulette! To make it fun and very random, I put all of the warehouse locations in a box, mixed it up and drew a location.
This location really could be anything. It’s one of the areas where we park incoming pallets that act like in-laws. Sometimes it’s a short stay, sometimes they take up residence. This particular pallet put the underwear in the drawer, so it’s probably going to sit there for a little while.
What does it have on it? Diaper pails! Yes, the dreaded sh*tcan, the can o’ sh*t, t, the oh-sh*t-what-the-day-yum-who-didn’t-even-try-to-shake-out-some-of-the-poo-and-it’s-been-sitting-here-for-a-week can. Have you ever run into that? Baby cranks out a masterpiece Snickers, but instead of power washing it off, dunk ‘n swishing it off or dropping it off into the toilet, it’s just tossed full-poo into the diaper pail. And of course, it’s one of the first one’s in after washing diapers, so it’s been sitting in there the longest. Ripening, fermenting, becoming one with the diaper and it yells surprise! when you find it. Aw man, those are the worst.
These diaper pails are a lovely shiny plastic stacked all nice and new, wrapped in plastic, but they’re like skunks. They look like fancy cats and when you get too close and personal, they unleash a fury of rage against your sinus cavities, ripping them apart from the inside out, daring you to come back, which you do, because you have to. The pretty kitty needs a bath.
Where do you put your diaper pail? It’s probably not in the bathroom, so how to you handle the transport of the rinsed off/dunked and swished poopy diaper from the bathroom to the diaper pail? They drip. They drip poopy water. They drip poopy water across the carpet from point A to point B. That’s nasty. It’s more nasty when you dunk and swish a peanut butter poo diaper. It just doesn’t come off and it requires multiple flushes. Telling yourself it’s chocolate pudding water only lasts so long when the stench is encouraging your stomach to put dinner back with the pudding. So once you’re done and are standing there holding a less poopy diaper with a mix of accomplishment and loneliness, what’s the best tactical maneuver for getting “Honeysuckle Alpha” over to “Prize Box” with minimal collateral damage? The hand under Honeysuckle Alpha works until it leaks through your fingers. Using a bag just isn’t practical. There’s never a full roll of toilet paper on the hanger, how is there ever going to be an extra bag in the bathroom when I need it? Bucket? Bowl? I just run fast and hope it doesn’t dribble on my legs and feet.
Ever drop Honeysuckle Alpha between the bathroom and the pail? What about the infamous poopy diaper in a ziplock bag left in the back of the car in the summer for weeks, then tossed in the diaper pail? There’s a reward posted for the perps involved with that one.
If you’re going to use cloth diapers, you need to have a containment vessel for storing said cloth diapers after they’ve been decimated by your little snowflake. This particular diaper pail is huge and holds plenty of diapers. It’s well made, with thick plastic walls and a lid held on with metal clasps to keep the beasties contained. It’s a great diaper pail. Go drive one today!
“Keep smiling, it makes everyone wonder what you’re up to.”
copyright 2012 Cotton Babies, Inc – The Sh*tcan